Category archive: Humour

Sikh and ye shall find

red turbanNews: Police called – Sikh student’s headphone wires protruding from his bag.

Saw someone suspicious on my morning walk today. I mean, who wears a red towel wrapped around their head for goodness sake – nobody I know. Had a woman with him and she laughs just that little bit too much. Sure sign something’s up.  She might be one of his harem. Could be his sex slave – could be his hostage! So I did the only decent thing – called 111.

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A hat-rack please…

hat-rack

Went shopping for a hat-rack the other day. No big deal, this was a need rather than a want – my hats had multiplied in direct proportion to my vanishing hair.

I rang a store which stocks everything from rope to paints and plants, and asked for a hat-rack.

“No we don’t sell any” said a South African accent a little too emphatically, the way some people do when they want you off the line.

“Really?”

“I’ll put you through to hardware” she said, and was gone, though Hardware was displeased.

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Will you piggy-wig, swear never to tell a Porky…?

Trial_of_PigAuckland lawyer, veterinarian and author has published his new book, Animals, Welfare and the Law. It encompasses ethics, history and the law, so it’s a weighty read for those of us who routinely plough through fiction.   But   Mr Robertson   has not overlooked the dark – but often comical moments in the long history of animals and humans.  Some of these include the criminal trials of animals…

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